"He got lucky, didn't he?"
Lap 13, and Daniel Ricciardo is convinced Vettel has pushed too hard, too early on his tyres - only for a safety car to eradicate his hopes of capitalising.
"Unbelievable... you're magic!" (Ferrari)
"Forza Ferrari [bursts into song]. A great race to win!"
There's only elation for Vettel however - and after launching into impromptu song, he makes his Ferrari crew promise to repay the favour in the post-race celebrations.
"Very good job Daniel. You'll upset your former team mate by the fact you got fastest lap, so let him know. You two were in a class of your own today." (Christian Horner)
"Thanks. I'll give him a bit of ****"
Ricciardo is also all smiles after claiming second, however - and he and Horner plan to give Vettel a ribbing before the podium.
"What fantastic luck with these **** safety cars. Unbelievable. ****."
There's a very different reaction on the other side of the Red Bull garage, however, with Daniil Kvyat irate at how the race got away from him.
"We need to swap positions okay? Swap positions..." (Toro Rosso)
"NO!"
Max Verstappen gives very short shrift to his team's instruction to let Carlos Sainz through on the penultimate lap.
"For info there's not a lot you can do but we see a glitch... look after the gearbox on the downshifts." (Williams)
"And how do you do that?" (Bottas)
"Just carry on doing what you're doing..."
Williams aren't quite as succinct, giving Valtteri Bottas a rather vague message about a transmission issue late in the race.
"I don't understand what he did..."
Bottas's team mate Felipe Massa also has a moment on confusion after colliding with Nico Hulkenberg when exiting the pits - an incident he pins on the Force India driver.
"The cars in front are making massive amounts of mistakes and the tyre recovers, whereas for us - no chance."
At McLaren, meanwhile, Jenson Button isn't too impressed with either his car's handling, or the techniques of those ahead of him...
"I should have known really that he's mental..." (Button on clashing with Maldonado)
"At last we've got a break with safety cars - well actually we got a break last time, we just ballsed it up." (Button on a botched first pit stop)
"And rub your tummy and pat your head?" (Button's response after a long string of driving requests)
It's not the only sardonic put-down the Briton makes during the race, who has both his team and Pastor Maldonado in his sights.
"I've lost power guys, lost power!"
"C'mon guys, how do I reset the throttle?"
"That doesn't work. We might as well save this engine... for all we know this driving could be killing it more. It's getting worse."
"Yeah it's a real shame. I think I had the pace to win..."
Problems strike Lewis Hamilton's Mercedes on lap 26 - and despite both his and the team's best efforts, he eventually heads for his first retirement of the season six laps later.
"My engine has gone off - come and get me at the end of the pit lane!" (Rosberg)
"Was it your mistake Nico?" (Mercedes)
"Affirm... I mean I'm not doing anything different to usual..."
Mercedes also encounter issues with Nico Rosberg's car - although they happen before the start, giving the team enough time to find a fix.
"I stalled, and engine off!" (Verstappen, lap 1)
"We made up a lot of positions, the car was really good!" (Verstappen, lap 61)
Verstappen also hits trouble at the start - but then fights back to eighth with typical swashbuckling panache.
"I hit the wall in Turn 18. Sorry guys."
Alexander Rossi's Grand Prix weekend debut doesn't get off to the greatest start in FP1 - but it proves to be the only hiccup in an otherwise assured weekend.
"What the **** are you doing? Come on, I almost crashed." (Kvyat)
"How is the pace? Why you don't talk to me?" (Perez)
FP2, and Kvyat keeps the censors on their toes with his anger at Grosjean - while Sergio Perez finds life slightly lonely while out on circuit.
"1.1s off yeah?"
It's not a question we expect to hear often from Lewis Hamilton, but FP3 confirms that Mercedes are very much on the back foot.
"I'm sorry about that. I thought I would make it, but I hit the wall. I lost the car."
Carlos Sainz is the only man to get familiar with the Singapore walls in qualifying, consigning him to 14th on the grid.
"Wow, what a good job man! Very hard at the end to keep these **** out!"
Sainz charges back in the race, however, as does team mate Verstappen - but Sergio Perez manages to hold them off in a three-way fight for seventh, much to the Mexican's elation.
