"Down on power guys, down on... engine's gone."
Jenson Button is the first casualty in Canada, his Honda engine giving up the ghost on lap nine. The Briton performs his own diagnosis - aided by the smoke cloud belching from the rear of his McLaren.
"Take it easy Kimi, take it easy..." (Ferrari)
"I cannot take it easy, I'm trying to keep them behind at the same time" (Raikkonen)
Ferrari, meanwhile, urge Kimi Raikkonen to manage his pace - a suggestion given short shrift by the Finn who has Red Bull's Daniel Ricciardo breathing down his neck.
"What the **** is the Manor doing?!"
Raikkonen is in feisty mood, this time directing his anger at the antics of backmarker Rio Haryanto.
"Get this traffic out of the way!"
"Mama mia what the hell is going on!?"
From one angry Ferrari driver to another - and Sebastian Vettel's Italian lessons are clearly paying off as he too berates the antics of some backmarkers.
"You gotta give me more information cos of all the stuff going on on my steering wheel, with the warnings and everything." (Rosberg)
"Copy. The warnings are real." (Mercedes)
Over at Mercedes, Nico Rosberg has concerns of a different nature as his steering wheel display lights up with warning lights - which Mercedes later suggested stemmed from his running off-track on the opening lap.
"It's like we're stuck in the temperature limiter..." (Button)
"Okay Jenson. Honda do understand the problem, but we need to box." (McLaren)
Error lights flash for Jenson Button too in FP1 - although his problems prove more serious, forcing him to spend much of the opening session on the sidelines.
If that was a bad start to the weekend for McLaren, the team's fortunes improved on Saturday as Fernando Alonso - much to his delight - booked an unexpected slot in Q3.
"Carlos are you okay?" (Toro Rosso)
"Yeah, I'm okay..." (Sainz)
Qualifying doesn't go quite as well for Alonso's compatriot Carlos Sainz, who becomes the latest victim of Montreal's infamous 'Wall of Champions'.
"I think I brushed a bit of lacquer off the rims, but the car is fine."
Vettel also flirts with the Wall of Champions during the fight for pole in Montreal - but the German escapes by mere millimetres.
"I think I had a problem... I cancel the DRS and I lost the rear completely."
The other big crash of the weekend comes in FP1, as Felipe Massa hits the barriers hard at Turn 1 - but the Williams driver demonstrates his expertise by immediately pinpointing the cause.
"Yes! P3! Brilliant Valtteri. Brilliant job all weekend."
Williams end the weekend on a very different note to how they started, as Valtteri Bottas claims his - and the team's - first podium of the season with a stellar drive to third.
"Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee! That was for Muhammad!"
The final word goes to Lewis Hamilton, who dedicates his victory to the memory of the late, great Muhammad Ali.